A few months ago, I reached possibly the most significant spiritual milestone so far in this journey. It’s a milestone which incorporates each of the other aspects (physical, emotional and relational) as well. And it changed my entire outlook on the circumstances that I’m facing.
In order to set the stage, I need to revisit my initial reaction upon receiving the diagnosis with MND/ALS. Nicky and I knew from the beginning that God was in control, and have trusted Him to carry us through this. We have always believed that God has many purposes that He is accomplishing through our circumstances—purposes both in our lives and in the lives of others.
But underlying all of this was the question of whether I believed God would heal me of this disease. There was no doubt in my mind that He was able to heal me—but would He? From a personal perspective, I was content with the fact that God was in control and His will would be done. I had surrendered to whatever outcome would be most favourable for God’s Kingdom to be furthered.
Added to the mix was the fact that several years earlier we had asked for healing for Nicky’s mother from cancer, but she continued to worsen and passed away two years later. As I once heard author Adrian Plass say, “We know two things about God: We know that He heals, and we know that sometimes He doesn’t heal.” God knew my need for healing, and I didn’t feel the necessity to do anything beyond trusting Him for the grace to live each day for Him.
Then one Sunday in a meeting of our local church during the sermon, God changed my whole perspective on healing. Not that my perspective had been wrong—just incomplete.
The elder preaching that morning pointed to various passages from the Bible that indicated God does not primarily respond to need. He responds to faith. There are exceptions to this, but none that are similar to my specific situation. This challenged me to consider that maybe it wasn’t enough just to rest in the fact that God knew my circumstances and my need for healing.
From that day to the present, I have been stirring my faith for healing by going to God’s Word, the Bible. He has often led me to specific passages that have built my expectation that I will experience healing this side of eternity.
Yes, it’s possible that I won’t be healed while on this earth. I don’t think that having faith for healing means I cannot acknowledge this possibility. I do think that having faith for healing is more about how I live and the choices I make each day. So while we are waiting, I choose to focus on accomplishing the work He’s called me to do, and on preparing for the radical changes to our lives that will result from receiving a miracle.
21 December 2008
17 December 2008
THE SPIRITUAL ASPECT – No. 3 - response
As an addition to my last post I include the following excerpt from an email response I have subsequently received. I trust you will find it as helpful as I did.
“If you read the account of Gods provision of Manna in Exodus 16 there is a verse that says, ‘Those who gathered much did not have too much and those who gathered little did not have to little. I get the impression that when the manna fell it did not cover the ground evenly. Thousands and thousands of people trying to gather, it was probably easier for some than for others and so some were able to gather more than others depending on where they found themselves. There was however this amazing grace factor that everyone had enough providing they had gathered. I think it is a picture of our devotional lives and manna is the substance that feeds our spirits. There are times when life does not afford us the time to gather easily but when we are faithful the little is not too little.”
“If you read the account of Gods provision of Manna in Exodus 16 there is a verse that says, ‘Those who gathered much did not have too much and those who gathered little did not have to little. I get the impression that when the manna fell it did not cover the ground evenly. Thousands and thousands of people trying to gather, it was probably easier for some than for others and so some were able to gather more than others depending on where they found themselves. There was however this amazing grace factor that everyone had enough providing they had gathered. I think it is a picture of our devotional lives and manna is the substance that feeds our spirits. There are times when life does not afford us the time to gather easily but when we are faithful the little is not too little.”
12 December 2008
THE SPIRITUAL ASPECT – No. 3
Another spiritual milestone that I’ve reached related to my growing physical challenges involves time. Before my diagnosis, I was pretty regular in spending time in prayer and Bible study. Early on I was able to maintain that regularity. As the disease progressed, however, more and more of my time in the day was taken up with practical things which took much longer to complete than before. The result was that my devotional time was squeezed out.
As I began spending less time in personal devotions, I also began feeling quite guilty about it. I spoke about it to one of the elders in our local church, and his counsel was that in God’s grace He sometimes will do more with less. I could see this working out in my life, but I still had a nagging feeling in my heart that I should still be trying to spend an hour every day like I used to do.
The breakthrough came when I heard a quote from a well-known Christian saying something like, ”Rarely do I spend a full hour a day in prayer. But rarely does an hour go by in a day that I don’t spend at least 10 minutes in prayer.” I don’t claim to that constant, but I do agree with the principle that I need to be aware of God’s presence, and my dependence on Him, throughout the day.
I have many 10-15 minute time slots available to me every day. In the early morning when I’m waiting for help to get out of bed; at mealtimes while I’m being fed; each afternoon while I’m receiving a circulation-boosting massage; and at night before I go to sleep I can use the time productively by praying or thinking about a Bible passage that I’ve read.
Nicky once asked me if I’m ever fearful. I can’t say I never get apprehensive about what may lie ahead, but my honest answer now is that most of the time I feel God so near that I can’t be afraid.
As I began spending less time in personal devotions, I also began feeling quite guilty about it. I spoke about it to one of the elders in our local church, and his counsel was that in God’s grace He sometimes will do more with less. I could see this working out in my life, but I still had a nagging feeling in my heart that I should still be trying to spend an hour every day like I used to do.
The breakthrough came when I heard a quote from a well-known Christian saying something like, ”Rarely do I spend a full hour a day in prayer. But rarely does an hour go by in a day that I don’t spend at least 10 minutes in prayer.” I don’t claim to that constant, but I do agree with the principle that I need to be aware of God’s presence, and my dependence on Him, throughout the day.
I have many 10-15 minute time slots available to me every day. In the early morning when I’m waiting for help to get out of bed; at mealtimes while I’m being fed; each afternoon while I’m receiving a circulation-boosting massage; and at night before I go to sleep I can use the time productively by praying or thinking about a Bible passage that I’ve read.
Nicky once asked me if I’m ever fearful. I can’t say I never get apprehensive about what may lie ahead, but my honest answer now is that most of the time I feel God so near that I can’t be afraid.
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